California's Proposition 8

I grew up in a house where I was often judged more by the alcohol intake level of my father than by the merits of my actions. Growing up in the 60s, I remember even more of the racism that often still exists just below the surface... never blatant, sometimes wholly unconscious, but omnipresent. Traits I learned and inherited from my maternal extended family - representing for me what family and love were all about - very Italian and very LOUD, were often judged as obnoxious and overbearing. I've regularly seen some self-proclaimed Christians distort what I read as the message of Jesus to the point where I don't think Jesus himself would recognize it. Growing up is always a process of discovery and decision-making. These early experiences started me toward a belief I hold very strongly today. All human judgment is incomplete and, therefore, flawed. We are all a product of our own histories, our own frames of reference. Our knowledge and understanding are limited. Our societal norms are nothing more than a collection of prejudices shaped by our collective histories. I'm not proposing anarchy. I'm not suggesting that our societal norms are wholly invalid. I'm not even suggesting that our judgments are necessarily incorrect. I'm simply suggesting that, as individuals, we all have a responsibility to know that our wisdom is incomplete and imperfect. We all have a responsibility to accept the history of others as true and valid. We all have a responsibility to seek to understand rather than to condemn.

It is in this context that I express profound disappointment with the passage of California Proposition 8 banning gay marriage. To me this represents a collective condemnation and attempted invalidation of every homosexual American's experience. Whether I agree with or support gay marriage is irrelevant. What I believe with all my heart and soul is that everyone has the right to their own conclusions, to their own passions. Not I, or anyone else, can fully know another's history, can fully understand the path any individual life may take. I have no right or true knowledge to tell anyone their love is not valid... and neither does the voting population of California. Certainly that voting population has the right to pass laws - and has. That fact does nothing to change the individual experience of those affected.